Willpower

Have you ever realised what you want to do in your life but somehow feel lazy to achieve it? Have you ever felt that you only able to see the outcome but run away from the difficult time-consuming process? Have you ever wished your dream come true magically when you wake up tomorrow? Have you ever felt like giving up?

All those questions are no strangers to me.

Last night, when once again I did not straight drift to my sleep, thoughts flooded my mind. And these thoughts were mainly bout my strength - not physical strength, but mental. There are times when I so urgently want to change the little little flaws within me. Every new year be it the changing of calendar year or my age, I promise myself to change. From the surface, all can't see this flaw. Only myself know, and I certainly want to change. However, always I failed. It was only last night that I realise why I failed, time and time again. I realised that I do not possess willpower strong enough to overcome all the distractions, disturbance, temptation, or whatsoever you call it.

Whatever we want to achieve, it often only lands in thoughts, decision, dream. What most of us lack is the willpower to pursue that dream. The urge to strive harder, forgetting the past, learning from mistakes. And the toughest of all is to overcome temptation that disturbs and provide obstacles to that light you want to grab at the end of the tunnel. To exercise willpower you need to choose to do it. It's all bout choice. I chose to change myself to the better (as how I want others to see and respect, and most importantly as how I want to see and respect). But what I never choose is to grab hold of my willpower, strengthen and enlarge it, and consume it. There are too, dreams, so many of them, that even I confuse which one actually suits me. But what? I am lazy. Lazy to go through the process. Lazy to do it by myself. And that is lack in willpower.

It is a no wonder why the saying goes "when there is a will, there is a way". Life is about choices. There is no such thing as destiny. It is the choice we made that forms our destiny. To survive life. To change for the better. To see the dreams you, I ever wish for. Willpower. Strengthen it.